My house is quiet. After nearly 3 months of everything being different and hard and heart-wrenchingly beautiful, it’s quiet again. Painfully quiet. I’m still living on the verge of tears, depending on the strength of my God as I put my house back in order and move back into our master bedroom. And today, this room looks almost as if nothing big happened here.
It’s pretty much like it was when I first re-decorated it and showed you all about it here. Back when I thought I was doing all that for Dave and I. It was before I fully realized how our homes and rooms can sometimes turn out to be sacred places where holy things happen.
My family, along with numerous other people, have spent hours in this room over the past few months– praying, laughing, crying, rejoicing. And now, the hospital bed and all the medical equipment is cleared out, and I’m sitting in the quiet, thanking God that he let me and my husband and my mom and my brother and sister and my children be the ones to hold my dad close in his last days here. It was extremely difficult to watch him digress, painful to see my mom lose the dearest person on earth to her. But, I thank God he let us be the ones to care for him. There are countless people who love my dad dearly and would have gladly accepted the chance to have him in their own homes in his last days, but we got to be the ones. We had the privilege of calling him “Dad” our whole lives. And that is a big deal to me.
There is so much I have learned and witnessed in these weeks. In fact, I could write a book about it. I will be sharing some of these things in the future. If you follow my Facebook page, you saw my posts that my dad left this earth last Saturday. I will never be able to thank some of you enough for how you’ve prayed for and encouraged me during this time. My dad was one of this blog’s biggest fans. He read every post and told me often that he was proud of me. That will always mean more to me than any number of subscribers or followers on Facebook. Dad and I discussed the fact that I would be sharing the steps of the end of his journey here on this platform and he was very grateful to all of you for your kind words and prayers for him. I want as many people as possible to be able to benefit from his influence as I have been privileged to do, so I will write more about his life and death and how it has changed me in the days to come.
As for the peace, we have it. My mom has told me she has an overwhelming peace and comfort in the midst of her grief, and I feel it as well. The Holy Spirit has done just what He said. He is with us, comforting us and surrounding us, and there is no way to adequately describe it because it really is beyond our reason and understanding, just as the bible promises it will be. That is one of the blessings we all have when we truly accept Christ into our hearts and lives.
I am posting the video of my dad’s memorial service, which was the sweetest and most appropriate funeral service I have ever attended. If you have time to watch this, it will give you a small glimpse of who my father was while he was here on earth. Every person who spoke was exactly on target, and my brother’s words were especially meaningful to me. In the service, they told of his life and of what happened in his last breaths as we gathered around him. You’ll also hear the voice of my dad himself in the middle of one of the songs, which is so unbelievably fitting and appropriate.
I thank you again for stopping here to read my lifeand the life of myfamily. If you found me while looking for a paint color or party idea, you should know it was not an accident. I want to tell you about someone that can change your life. His name is Jesus. My daddevoted his life to leading people to Him, and Iwant to, too.